You’ll need the right accent to pull that one off. I can’t even decide if the chicken or the egg came first. An Arkansas architectural student out in the middle of the ocean trying to build a foundation for a house. I have been a volunteer for Crisis Text Line for six months now. The third one ducks. What does it take for a football player to pass a class? A great bit of banter…right before asking if someone else can cover the check. If you are not in college, you may not get the point in some jokes. Is She Playing Hard to Get? 22. But after thinking about it for a while, I decided to go home. If you didn't know (sorry), we've been locked down for over 200 days now, and chances are, you are ready for it to be OVER. Because then it would be a foot. "The female hostel will be prohibited for all male students, and the male dormitory to the female students. They can be witty and hysterical, but there’s something so silly about them at the same time. While you continue working on prioritizing your health and happiness in 2020, why not transform your social media feeds to be places that inspire and teach you? 33 Best Travel Trivia Questions And Answers You Should Know, 73 Best Summer Trivia Questions And Answers You Should Know. 13. Deploy after you grow bored discussing the wedding. 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Father: “What, son?” “That’s funny,” the boy said to himself. On the way to the store, the dad asks his son if he would like to ride his new bike home. Did you hear about the Louisiana Tech professor who stood in front of a mirror for two hours, wondering where he’d seen himself before? In return, these survey respondents got money back for their coffee — something any user who downloads the app can do as well (yes, even you). “It’s God’s will! College student: “Well, you get to keep it!”. I’ll send you some money. 7. 1. Get your day started right — and keep that budget tight. Signs You’re No Longer in College… You no longer know what time fast food drive-thru windows close. That ignores the fact that developing a good pun is actually pretty hard work. 5. They looked at the first problem, worth 5 points. Because she’s always running away from the ball. Coffee, for billions of people, is one of the only things that can get us out of bed (after hitting snooze a time or two), especially in 2020. Make sure the people you tell the jokes to are receptive. At 6 a.m., you’re putting your contact lens in instead of taking them out. The professor says, “I want those guys back in the lab after lunch.”. An eccentric philosophy professor gave a one question final exam after a semester dealing with a broad array of topics. A nutty knock knock if there ever was on. What kind of degree? Teach a little biology with your dad joke! Actually, the universal union of fatherhood has opened the doors recently on dad jokes, allowing all those without kids to enjoy the fun, too. Why do college students have TGIF on their shoes?… Toes Go In First! In algebra and calculus classes, I would look at those graphs called “conic sections,” and I either zoned out or freaked out. 17. Clare Regelbrugge, University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign, Sign in to comment to your favorite stories, participate in your community and interact with your friends. Would you like to hear a construction joke? None, that is what having a smart roommate is for! A professor had been after her students to bring in their 2 dollars for the class picture. This is an open letter to all the people that have tried to define what beauty is. Anybody caught breaking this rule the second time will be fined $60. “Has anyone in this class touched our professor’s brain?” Silence. Finally, the Texan was put into position. Wife: Didn’t you feel a hand in your pocket? 4. As a result, they missed the final. Because the pee is silent. Tell this one quietly…you know the rules. If your glass set is composed of McDonald’s Extra Value Meal Plastic Cups (ie.Olympic Dream Team I or II). Jasper is our expert conversationalist and wordsmith. They studied that night and went in the next day at the time the professor had told them. According to LiveShopper Sassie's Coffee Project survey, when it comes to chain coffee shops, there are definitely preferred spots you'll want to hit up for your go-to order — whether you order the classic, frozen, or flavored coffee, an espresso, tea, or other. An impasta. 10 Fictional Women Who Really Want You to Vote. The boy replied, “No, I just didn’t want to see you standing there all by yourself.”. He’s gone. – 7 Signs a Girl Likes You! I am making lot$ of friend$ and $tudying very hard. Enjoy these funny college jokes and puns. The manager greeted him with a warm handshake and a smile, gave him a broom and said, “Your first job will be to sweep out the store.”, “But I’m a college graduate,” the young man replied indignantly.